The ONE Trick to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others and Enjoy Your Life Now More Than Ever
By Natasha Lindor | @NatashaLindor
If you’re like most people, you enjoy your life a lot more when you feel confident and happy about what you’ve got going on. Today’s Enjoy Your #SocialLife Challenge will help you make the next 12 months more amazing than the past 12 months. (Fortunately there is no limit to the amount of joy and happiness you can experience in any area of your life … no matter what has been true for you up until this point.)
Alright, let’s do this!
When you hear about updates and accomplishments from friends, family members, co-workers or colleagues, do you ever feel you can’t help but start to compare yourself and think you should be much further ahead by now:
“All my girls are married or in happy relationships. I’m probably going to be single forever. All the guys who reach out to me on those online dating sites are so not my type.”
“Wow, she has a vacation home on the beach and I’m still up to my ears in student loan debt!”
“She just had a baby and is already back in her skinny jeans. I swear I go up a dress size anytime I even look at a pizza.”
This, my friend, is the Compare and Despair Cycle, and it’s not pretty. No matter how much work you’ve put into your life, career, health, relationships or any other area of your life, you can’t help but feel behind. You’ve been working your tail off and everyone else is living your dream life — better, faster, first. Before you know it, you find yourself thinking about what you could’ve, should’ve or would’ve done to get different results.
Now, I know we’re driven people, but can you see how a cycle like this can kickstart a spiral of regrets and inaction? I sure can. I have my own version of this story. When I get hit with a case of Compare and Despair, I generally feel pretty blah about what I have to offer and therefore don’t feel very motivated. However this story shows up for you, I understand it’s not a fun place to be because it sucks the joy out of life and the success you’ve already created.
How about we rewrite the story so it doesn’t end in regret?
While I don’t claim to have it all figured out there is one very simple thing you can do now so that you don’t end up with a pile of regrets this time next year.
Take time out of your busy schedule to reflect so you can be smart and thoughtful about making the next 12 months more amazing than this year. Regardless of what your life has been like up until now, please know there is always room for more happiness, joy and satisfaction.
YOU are ultimately in the driver’s seat of your life. The more you focus on YOU and the less you focus on everyone else, the easier and more enjoyable it will be to create a life you enjoy.
And let’s not forget that heading into this next phase of your life armed with a-has from the past 12 months = A stronger, calmer, happier, more empowered you. Sounds pretty darn powerful, doesn’t it? And it’s totally achievable.
That’s why your next Enjoy Your #SocialLife Challenge, should you choose to accept it, is to get your room-for-more-amazingness reflection a-ha party started so you can tap into your power and use it to make the next 12 months more amazing than the last 12 months.
However things have gone for you up until now, consider everything went exactly the way it needed to … even if it didn’t seem to be “according to plan.” Regardless of what happened, WHO you are becoming as a result of the situations, relationships and events in the past 12 months is just as important (if not more important) than WHAT you’ve accomplished.
NOW is the perfect time to look back at the past year and mine for those Golden A-Ha Nuggets—the insights and lessons from the situations, accomplishments and opportunities that will ultimately allow you to make next year your best, most satisfying one yet.
I find it helpful to have a few reflection questions to guide my thoughts. I have a feeling you’d find it useful, so I put 10 of the most powerful questions you can ask yourself to create more happiness and success in the next 12 months into a handy guide. You can grab your free copy here.
Whether you choose to use this resource or something else, I encourage you to take the time to pause and reflect on how the situations, relationships and events of the past 12 months have shaped you so you can make a conscious choice about what you want to let go of and what you want to carry you forward into the next 12 months.
Remember: You always have a choice. You don’t have to settle for more of the same if that’s not what you want. You can choose to do something now to make the next 12 months your best ones yet so you don’t end up with a pile of regrets 12 months from now.
I’d love to hear from you. How are you different today than you were 12 months ago? In the comments below let me know ONE thing you enjoyed most in the last 12 months. (It can be any area of your life). Not only will sharing help you reflect and acknowledge your highlights, but it will inspire others and you will inspire me to create other challenges to help you experience more of those enjoyable moments.
I am grateful for you being here. It is because of you that I keep at it every day, doing what I can to help you enjoy your life, the people in it and the work you do.
I believe in you and your happiness. You’ve got this and I’m here to help.